I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Dignity is for republicans.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
