two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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