New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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