nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
