For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
i think i just lost a toe
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
