Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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