I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
