Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
