I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize