is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
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