Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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