how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Randomize
