talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I want to walk on stilts...naked
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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