I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
