As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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