I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize