Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
