I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
