god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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