mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
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all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
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Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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