but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
