Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
