Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
