Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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