My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
