I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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