you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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