I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
