I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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