i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize