is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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