Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
