im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
