Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
