Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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