i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
