The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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