just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
