She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
