Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
