Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
