that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize