i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
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