She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
