people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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