do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
