I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
