Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Randomize
