On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
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He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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