I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
