so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
